We all know by now the twelfth Doctor is Peter Capaldi, who is (naturally) Scottish, mid-50s, looks a little like Mr. Bean’s more serious brother, and possibly one of the most boring choices the producers could have made. Consider that he played a Roman Senator in a previous Doctor Who episode, was featured in the […]


Putting up a sign that you have a smoke-free policy in the workplace will only invite people to come in and smoke, knowing that everyone is defenseless against second-hand smoke. Lowering the speed limit will only increase speeding, since people already drive too fast; if anything, we should raise the speed limit to 120 mph, […]


I take my job as an amateur internet writer very seriously. So I’ll take any interview that will score me a lot of hits. Even, as was the case yesterday, if most of those hits are self-inflicted kicks in the ass. I was loitering in an upscale hotel near LAX, minding my own business, when […]


My mandatory employee training is today. It’s the “Welcome to the Family!” experience all the new employees get forced into taking. I wonder what it’s called when you are fired? Do they say that they are putting you up for adoption? Larry won’t be running it; luckily, Charlene the HR lady is doing it. Learning […]


Dick groaned and rolled over onto his back, the arrow jabbed inside him crunching in half under his awe-inspiring weight.  His vision was hazy, but he could just barely see the figure of a man or woman with a bandana pulled up over their mouth and nose walking towards him swiftly.  In their hand was […]


My sister told me that I should start a diary to record all of my feelings. She’s a psychiatrist, the real crown jewel of the family. She has $200,000 in debt and a piece of paper hanging on her wall and she thinks it gives her the right to tell people how to live their […]


For more wit and wisdom in cartoon form, be sure to visit Kevin’s website, Donuts For Sharks.  Go on.


July 13th 2012 – I drove to work without my seatbelt today. Today was my second annual performance review and I figured that I’d be better off dead than sitting through another three hours of Larry’s “pep talks.” Larry is my boss. I hate Larry. Have you ever read those Dilbert comics with the spiky-haired […]


To the owner of Beachfront Pet Shop: I admit that my presence may have played a slight role in the events that unfolded in your pet shop last Thursday, but I believe that on further reflection you will find that the fault lies primarily with you own staff.  And while I personally don’t feel as […]


Everywhere you look, there’s that one popular topic that is all the rage in news and popular culture right now.  We here at Fancy Bucket decided to do a little quick browsing on the Internet about this popular topic and we found some mildly amusing things relating to it that may make you chuckle or […]


For more wit and wisdom in comic form be sure to check out Steve’s site, Don’t Look In That Bucket.


Times have been tough lately.  Fresh out of college, no jobs for a philosophy major in this economy.  So when my cousin Fred in Orange County offered me a job at the pool cleaning service he works for, I couldn’t say no.  I’ll be honest, I didn’t know the first thing about taking care of […]


Morrison immediately shut his mouth, however, when he remembered that he was a macho man and he wasn’t going to let some wimpy little monkey get in his way.  He bit his tongue and forced back another scream, even though the tearing away of his face flesh really did hurt a whole lot. “They don’t– […]


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